I have always wondered why men have such an aversion to purchasing feminine hygiene products. It's not like we're asking them to use their bare hands and scoop up a pile of used ones. The ones you purchase are clean, and neatly wrapped in the manufacturers box. Do they think it is a violation of their manhood? Do they think the store clerk is looking at them thinking "Oh....he's a Trany". Or "Oh...wonder what he's going to do with those?". No, the store clerk thinks.."Oh...what a nice guy, he's got a wife or girlfriend and he's man enough to buy these for them". So, if anything, it would be a definite "Non-gay" plug to boost their ego.
Mark has always been great about buying them, and...... he always gets the right kind. Which is a big plus considering he has to stand in the isle, reading the boxes, while all the other men walk past thinking "Oh...he's a Trany" or "Oh...wonder what he's going to do with those". My brother, on the other hand, is one of those guys who would rather die a slow death being stabbed with hot pokers and having his eyes pecked out by parasite infested vultures, then to buy a box of Tampons. Yet, these same men think nothing of buying Jock itch cream, or hemorrhoidal ointment when they need it. Now THAT would be something for the store clerks to have a field day with, once they left the store. If I were the clerk in the store, I would be much more inclined to be attracted to a guy who would buy a feminine hygiene product for a female in need, then one buying jock itch cream!
So guys, next time you see a hot store clerk that you're trying to pick-up, buy a box of tampons and tell her it's for your sister. You'll have a much better chance to score than if she thinks you have a Hemorrhoid tumor sticking out of your ass, or an itchy "Member". Just sayin......
HA. Um, you going to the store honey? Can you pick me up a box of Tampons? Silence, dear caught in the headlights look, grumble grumble.....seriously, WHY would they be for him? It isnt like I said, can you head down the Monistat 7 aisle? AND oh yea, by the way, I shot an 8 lb 10 oz cannon out of my vagina, all in the name of love. Pretty sure you can handle a box of Tampons! I do have to giggle when I see a guy standing in front of all those choices; with applicator, without applicator, scented, springy fresh, small, medium, large...pad, with wings, pad withgout wings, extra long (what is THAT about) I agree , that it is a very secure man to walk out of the store with a bright pink box full of tampons and THAT is love! LUBB this Steff! LUBB it!
ReplyDeleteeh I dont have an issue with it. i like to fill my cart with taampons and pretend i am talking on the cell phone, exclaiming loudly "exactly how heavy is your flow!??" and then i act all frustrated, leaving the cart behind me "saying that maybe it woiuld be easier if you sat on sheep"
ReplyDeleteother times, when i've actually had to go out by these items, i get confused and end up buying three or four boxes of the same brand. not knowing if the girl requires wings or not, extra absorbancy etc.
women dont like to answer questions regarding fitment or abosorbant attributes. sure, a random woman will stop me in clothing store and ask me to try on a jacket to see if it fits because "i am approx. the size of the husband, son or boyfriend"
but in the same regard, if say "excuse me, you are approximately the same size as my girlfriend can you tell mewhat size to get or how much blood one the puppies soak up " the woman usually says nothing and walks away looking shocked and/or disgusted. "hey lady! i am jsut trying to buy the right thing! thanks for the help!"
and for you ladies who were fortunate to have sons: if you really want to torture a male, send your sons to go buy you tampons.
This made my day. Truth and laughter all in one! Great job Steff!
ReplyDeleteLMAO at Rick and the "Sat on a sheep"! I can't believe no one wants to help you with absorbency questions in the store! LOL!
ReplyDeleteAllie, you are so right, when we Literally pass PEOPLE out of our Vagina's, why can't they handle a lil box of tampons? And..they have no prob buying MAGNUM condoms (Like they would really fit) so the store clerk knows how big their member is and that they're sharing it will ALL the ladies. Yet God FORBID, They want anyone to think that They're buying something for a girl that goes "you know where, for you know what" PFFFTT!!
Oh, and thanks Anonymous, obviously, you are a girl......:)
Do they make a tampon to sop up the ghey that Mark oozes when he's reading labels?
ReplyDeleteAnd this...coming from a Fancy man that drinks drinks with gingerbread men in them......
ReplyDeleteLOL, Rick. Shit that sheep thing was funny. I have YET to be asked that question by a man...or a woman for that matter.
ReplyDelete*I* did not drink that...that was Allison's!!!
ReplyDelete*I* had a Mai Tai with pieces of fruit around the rim.
FURTHERMORE...men only want to know about your vaginas when they are in working order. I don't patronize stores that I like when they're closed for business, OR buy them products to clean up messes that occur from time to time.
No need to thank me for clearing that up for you...it was MY pleasure.
Oh...I'm sorry JoeIE, you had the Fruity tootie drink, not the Gingerbread man drink...that is SOOO much more manlier!...my Bad.....
ReplyDeleteMarrk is a real man Steph. I can say that I have made ''the'' purchase before. It was actually for a former secretary though!
ReplyDeleteMy hubby has no prob buying tampons... What I'd like to know is; What is all that other femine hygene stuff out there??? saw a commercial for "all day comfort" product, was a gel... WTF??? ewww... no added mess please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I said to my hubby after seeing that comercial.. think I might be gay if I was a guy.. scary what they must wonder goes one down there... if I don't even know what that stuff is for....
ReplyDeleteWTF? IS THAT FOR?
ReplyDeleteI have no problems buying pad's or tampons! I even use pad's myself. Hope I don't shock you too much, but some men aren't as worried or ashamed to buy the products as you think.
ReplyDelete